It really is a word, Shack!

Hooray, I've got this working with Real Alternative and Firefox now (it was actually very simple I just hadn't downloaded any of the bits when I first tried to listen).

Razzmatazz by Pulp.

I've just sent in a story of my own

I'm looking forward to it.

This is you now, right?

Yep. And for the record, the sonnet was dead classy.

I believe it. Did things work out?

Everyone stayed friends for a while, but I haven't spoken to her for over a year now. No loss, she was rather smug and self-satisfied really.

Get cape. Wear Cape. Fly! Fantastic, well done Bob.




ED: Hahahahaha. You read it beautifully, Mr Shack.

It was a lovely sonnet Mr Gimp, if only my stumbly bumbly voice worked correctly I could have read it even nicer.

The word in question referred to by Julie was "skeezy" - apparently a mixture of "sleazy" and "sketchy". Those crazy Torontonians. They'll make up words at the drop of a hat.

Thanks for e-mailing in peeps. Sostie sent a dead good one in but we forgot to read it. Sorry Mr S.

I never realised how mawkish it was until I found it again last night.

I thought it was bloody lovely, but then I'm King Mawkio from Mawksterland, whose insides consist of tweeting birds, kittens in wicker hampers and wuvverly cuggerly teddies.

I'd have gone out with you if you'd sent it to me and I was a girl who wasn't being stalked.

You pour your heart out to someone....

No worries, I'm sure it was a bit too long anyway. Good show, as usual. Wasn't Andy Crane nice? But no Jilted John!!

EDIT: to make Gimp look like he can't spell "Andy", and to spare the shame of having spelt a variation of my own name incorrectly

Andy Crane needed to back off the mic a bit.



ED: You cheeky blighter!

Andy Crane was dead nice. A top top bloke I thought. Can't believe he had false nails fitted....

I don't know what happened to Jilted John - it was on the playlist I had in front of me last night, shceduled for about 10 to nine, but it didn't get played. I'd blame Fischer if I were you. I was drunk by then.

'Down the Line' (Tuesdays 11:30pm R4)

A spoof call in show from the the Fast Show team, it's one of the funniest shows I've heard in a long time. I just wish I'd thought of it.

Rhys Thomas is hysterical.

There's no juice in trees!

"Fuh-jye-dots"

Just like fajitas. Or something.

I'm on air now guest presenting with one of my mates, so feel free to listen in for some nonsense.

Leave the Fugees out of it.

Only just listening to valentine's night gobstopper now. Stephen Fry being used to gunging people made me laugh.

Graham "Jilted John" Fellows is a guest on Gobstopper tonight, so I'll definitely play the single, honest!

Got a topic of discussion as well if anyone fancies it. As Robbie Williams checks himself into a clinic to treat his spiralling addiction to Nurofen, Red Bull and Maxwell House, what have you ever been addicted to? Could be odd food, drinks, a computer game, a strange depraved solo pastime, a sport, or something unsavoury like biting your nails or pulling wax out of your ears with an Azimuth screwdriver.

Please e-mail guilty confessions to...

gobstopper@bbc.co.uk

...and I've got two signed copies of Harry Pearson's excellent new book "Achtung Schweinhunt!" to give away to the two best suggestions.

Other guests tonight are current Top 20 stars Little Man Tate and former Gorky's man Euros Childs. Plus live music from Boro mod stars Modern Works and, a chat with Kiwi comic Sully O'Sullivan.

And new music from The Waterboys, The Aliens, Get Cape Wear Cape Fly, The Rakes an' all that.

Gobstopper on BBC Radio Cleveland 95FM, tonight from 7-10pm, or listen live on www.bbc.co.uk/tees

Cheers!
Fischface

Aaah balls! Liverpool v Barca tonight

You can listen again for a week afterwards if you follow the same link...!

Yes, but there's no Shack. So what's the point, really?










(Edit - that sounded really nasty. I was, of course, joking )

He and Miniature G are interchangeable; you'll never notice the difference.

When I spent the day with the pair of them, half the time I didn't even know who I was talking to.

I'm by myself tonight. I need your love.

All of you.

Aww, I thought for a minute you were talking specifically to me. I knew it was too good to be true.

Aw, don't be like that. Not everyone gets invited in to do live on-air colouring in. You're special.

Is Mr Jilted the Little Legend?

Thanks for The Boro t-shirt by the way...it's grand.

Tee hee hee

It may be the virtual equivalent of a pat on the head, but I'll take it!

I'm dead good at colouring me.

Consider Mr Jilted an unofficial Little Legend, ie I haven't sold it to him like that! He's doing the interview cos he's got a gig up here.

Got some cracking Little Legends lined up though... next week it's Bob Carolgees, and I've got Maggie Philbin and Fred "Les from Vic Reeves Big Night Out" Aylward confirmed as well!

Fred Aylward phoned me at home yesterday. Really disappointed he actually spoke - I wanted to do the interview with him completely silent on the other end of the phone.

Muddy mildred, you give people an inch and they take a mile.

At least Julie knows which side her bread is buttered, gawd bless her.

I'll e-mail in an addiction because I'm nice like that. I can't wait for Carolgees next week, although having a ventriloquist on the phone means we won't know if his lips are moving or not.

Yeah, cos Spit The Dog always had so much to say, didn't he?

Kids today.

Bob now runs a candle-making shop in Cheshire, it's called Carolgees Candles. Their motto is "Let Me Handle Your Candle".

No, really.

I'll need some candles for when I can't afford to pay the bills in my new house.

See if he can do me a deal.

Spit the Dog was one of the greatest comic creations ever to have a hand up his bum. He's in the same league as Sooty or Cuddles the monkey.

...and Miniature G.

And on THAT bombshell, I'm going home.

I'm available for a phone interview if you're really stuck, I can review what I had for tea, what I'm wearing and how many wees I've done today.

It's currently 4.

I'm on air now, feel free to listen in. There's also a discussion about scary stories you've seen on Crimewatch, so feel free to email in any you've seen.

Bah! Last time I e-mailed about that you refused to read it!

Wasn't that particular e-mail a badly covered metaphor for you doing a big wank?

We have some standards.

Menswe@r = good

Descriptions of wanking = bad

What does Descriptions of Wanking Mensw@r equal?

Depends who was the wanker and who was the wankee.

It's like constructing a sentance in Latin!

Don't get me started on wankii.

Honestly. Week after week of sending in solid gold material, then you try and join in on the Halloween festivities and they throw it back in your face.

I'll stop listening, you know. I will. I'll do it.

Just as soon as I find something better to do on a Wednesday night.


Have Nintendo announced the name of their next console already? They don't hang about.

I'm listening to Russell Howard (after this morning enjoying a hilarious Russell Brand show) and I'm heartened to know that while I badly try and drop his name, even though I've only met him twice, he's doing the same thing.

"Now The Magic Numbers with 'This is a Song', he's lovely this guy, I've met him"

But wasn't he lovely? When he giggled he looked like a lovely squinty cartoon lion.

Great for a cuddle, I'll bet.

That's just what I said!

I bet he's a great cuddler.

My friend Dave, he of the world record skateboarding, is going to be on Johnnie Walker's Sunday show on Radio 2 between 4.30-5.00pm this Sunday, if anyone fancies a listen. He's an amazing guy who continues to raise money for the charities he skated for.

Mark Radcliffe read my text out last night on his show, as he and John Shuttleworth laughed heartily at my suggestion for their "alternative movies starring them two" feature.

My suggestion? The Sod Couple.

Someone else texted in with The Buns of Navarone, which made me laugh.