There have been lots of comments on the board about favourite movies becoming fodder for the hollywood movie machine, so I thought a specific topic for such sacrilege would be appropriate.

Having watched the travesty that was the 're-imaginging' of POTA it has to be top of my list since, even with a quality director and cast, the movie mogul grip throttled it until it became a limp and lifeless parody of the original by the time it hit the screens.

There, that's off my chest. How 'bout you?

I actually quite liked "Planet of the Apes: Whizz-Band Edition". I think Tim Burton did a good job directing it, and I just adored the "is there a soul in there?!" bit. It's more of an action film than anything else, of course, which removes it far from its parent film, but that doesn't necessarily make it bad. Granted, the ending is just confusing and stupid ( I haven't given it much thought since I saw it in the cinema, though.) but the rest is quite enjoyable.

My candidate will have to be the late seventies remake of King Kong. It completely destroyed all that was appealing about the original, and even removed the tyrannosaurus-fight. Boo! Hiss! Peter Jackson is reintroducing that bit, so YAYH!

Thunderbirds.... "LETS THUNDERIZE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"... although I'm pretty sure the original movie was bad as well. People need to learn when to leave things alone!

I thought that the seventies rendition of Kong just jumped upon the old, supplant action for any kind of quality storyline.....hang on, that rings a bell. It must be good then.


JJM

Thunderbirds. I knew it would be bad, but I didn't think a film could be THAT bad . . .

The Avengers was pretty sh*te as well . . .

very poignant, jaffaman. Quite. Quite. The thing is that the original Kong is also an action feature. The things they didn't keep in the seventies remake weren't storyline points. They were actually mostly action-bits and, as far as I remember, the sexual undertone of Kong's relationship to his dream-girl. In the original, it's actually quite out there.

It needs to be said that I saw the Tim Burton PotA before I saw the original (boo! hiss! I know.) But that's the way it is, I guess.

The big fire scene in Gone With The Wind was used as a handy way for the studios to get rid of the HUGE King Kong set. True titbit of the evening. Now, shut up, I'm A Celeb is on.

Forgive my petulance. It's that 'Tim and Star Wars' kinda mentality that has never left me.


JJM

Every remake that turned an awesomly scary japanese movie into a farcical mince pie.

*shakes fist*

The Grudge wasn't so bad. Still retained some shit scariness.

My vote goes to Alfie. Not that I'm a big fan of the original (it's a bit rubbish really) but the remake is without a shadow of a doubt one of the biggest pieces of shit ever to disgrace a cinema screen.

Psycho.

I mean, Why? ...So they could set it present day, & film it in colour? That made it worse! The rest was identical shot for shot. I didn't see the point. It was well made, but if you're going to remake a film, do it differently.

...or did i miss the point?

No....you're quite right. A bit like getting a Turner, painting over the top of it and claiming it as your own. Movies by numbers.


JJM

Totally agree!
They remade the damn thing in colour and then made it so drab and dreary and with so little colour in it - they might as well have left it in black and white.

And the only thing they added was Norman Bates masturbating. Now was that *really* necessary???

Have these people ever heard of the power of suggestion?

Cheers
AC

I keep thinking of Godzilla.......Why is that? Oh, yeah....it was shit. Plenty of action though!


JJM

Admittedly I haven't seen the original, but the re-made Grudge scared the piss out of me. Eeeeurgh. I still get the shivers thinking about the Noise and the Little Boy.

The following is a list of films I have point blank refused to watch, simply because I disagree with the concept of remakes, except in the circumstance where the original was shit. These originals weren't shit:

The Italian Job
Alfie
Taxi
Get Carter
Planet of the Apes

Why is Hollywood so keen to remake Michael Caine films? They'll be remaking A Muppet Christmas Carol next.

Then there's the cashing in on popular books/TV shows/cartoons (I'm looking at you SpiderGrinchintheThunderHatGarfield) but that's something for another thread.

GET CARTER!!! without a doubt. Why on earth did Micheal Caine agree to be it!!

Money?

It was definately the motivator for him to star in Jaws the Revenge. He admits himself that this film is the worst he's ever agreed to do.

Still did it though, dinnee?


JJM

hee hee hee
I see your point
ets face it though he cant really use that excuse now the guy must be minted!!

Godzilla destroyed my faith in remakes...spent the entire film laughing at the disgraceful script and then left feeling like I thrown an hour and a half of my life in the bin....

rubbish!!

Px

I'm expecting him to turn up in Corrie any day now. Kerrrrrrching!


JJM

Surely Hollyoaks would have him!! hee he he

But can they afford him? Apparently he can eat his own body weight in cockles.



Mmmmmm vinegar!


JJM

Yes. Now you've just reminded me, i'll never be able to get to sleep tonight!
I saw the remake first and don't think I'm going to watch the original anymore...

Oh thank god someone else was scared by it; I thought I was losing my critical horror movie watching facilities.

Actually, I really want to see it again now. It's a bit like eating a ridiculously hot curry - once the pain and burning has subsided you want another mouthful.

I swear some of you people have got me on ignore or something.

Did someone say something just then?

Count me in as a Grudge remake scaredy cat!

I'm a big fan of horror, especially Japanese stuff (the new black!) and I'm usually not bothered by it in the slightest. But this film led me to have trouble sleeping. Every time I shut my eyes - the noise! Dear lord the noise!!

It baffles me why they have to remake some films at all. Now I have never even seen the remake of 'The Ladykillers' and am not even a big fan of the original. But I did see the original recenly, and enjoyed it and complately agreed with my mates rant about the remake. The thing is that some of these older films only really work in that time it was originally filmed. Ladykillers is about a sweet old lady in 40s/50s when people especially little old ladies were more moral and trusting. So for me the idea of doing that plot in this day and age is just stupid! Same with the Italian Job and Psycho, they worked THEN to do it now just takes away the whole point of it. (and I guess you could bring in Star Wars, although the new films aren't remakes, they have become something that the original films were not all about)

And American film companies always have to remake Japanese and British films, it's almost like they can't bear tham to be successful in their native countries and want to muscle in on the success. Why can't they just leave them to be remembered as they are??

Of course the most irritating thing is that the new generation of film wathers will be tanted by these new versions before even seeing the originals. I make it my mission to educate my younger relatives to the old skool of cinema, ha!

Oh and finally, someone mentioned Taxi which we went to a preview of recently and thought it was fairly average, I have the original here and have to get round to watching it but have heard from several people it pisses over the new one from a great height. Tsk...

I thought the Ladykillers remake was hilarious and worked very well.
If it hadn't been a Coens movie it would have been better received.

Just to show you're not being ignored here....I agree with you! But I'm biased, I love the Cohen brother's stuff. Fargo is one of my all time favourite movies.


JJM

Love Cohen bothers (millers Crossing and Big Lebowski my favourites but love farg and oh brother to and...fuck just like all the cohen brothers films)

Stallone's Get Carter must be the worst ever remake, not seen it but it must be the worst remake ever. It has to be.

I've never bothered to see the remake of The Italian Job either.
What would be the point?
I know it's rude of me to just assume but I reckon I can safely say that they wont have made anything as good as the original, let alone added anything to it.

Oh and they cannot remake A Muppet Christmas Carol - that would be sacrilige!





Don't worry Whitey. I get that feeling sometimes too. All these little conversations come off everyone elses posts except mine and it's like "Hey! What's so wrong with my post???"
I guess it happens to all of us sometimes.


Re: The Grudge
This has only just been released in Australia and I haven't seen it yet so please don't talk tooooo much about it. No spoilers ok. I'm living in the land that time forgot here, so everything that happens here happens months after anywhere else.

Re: Cohen Brothers
They rock!

Cheers
AC

It's Coens for fuck's sake, not Cohens!

If people like their films so much at least pay attention to their names on the credits.

*rolls eyes*


PS. I'm not really angry

PPS. But it is a niggle of mine, same as when football commentators refer to Milan as 'AC', which would be like calling Arsenal 'FC'.

re: Coens - Even Intolerable Creulty? I found the movie to be ... zzz....

Intolerable Cruelty was ok, but it is the worst Coens film I've seen - still haven't seen Ladykillers as the original is a masterpiece.

If not angry...then maybe just a little sad? I stand corrected Cohen...sorry Conan....sorry Coen...there got there in the end.

It's terrible being a fan ain't it?

JJM

Not sad, just precise.

Precisely. Sad.

Only kidding......no please, put the gun down (Boom) aaargh!

Police report states that the victim was merely 'funny lookin''


JJM

Just picture me looking exactly like Daisy does at the start of "Art" when Tim says "Don't sneak up on me like that!"

Cheers
Milan

Just to clarify are you with the spelling Nazi's or the spelling Nihilist's

Nazi's or Nihilist's what?


(Tch. Have you read Eats, Shoots and Leaves young man?)

Bugger. No I haven't read it. Shit like that always catches me out (*dylexic left, school at 16). Bugger. Ruined a perfeftly good joke there by mixing my plurals with my possesives.

*Mild, doesn't affect my reading at all (which is rare I'm told).

So Stella are you the with grammar Nazis if so, join with us grammar Nihlisists. (It's easier).

No sir! I shall never give up my membership of the Grammar Nazis, not while there are still missing or extraneous apostrophes in the world!

PS - Sorry, I was only being cheeky. Didn't mean to make you feel bad. Here, have a smiley:

Cheers Stella, that's my favourite smiley.

I don't feel bad (being a dyslexic writer is 24/7 fun, fun, fun). I am however hunting down all my old teachers and disembowling them with teaspoons. Bitter, me? Never.

Les Visiteurs and Taxi were fine as they were.

Goodamn it!

-m0r

The 1976 version of King Kong?

Foreign Language remakes are for a certain type of person who can't be expected to chat, eat, take mobile calls.....and read, all at the same time.
And the other type are by stupid Americans for stupid Americans. We don't even have to get involved. I know I don't.

Gus Van Sant's Psycho. Utterly pointless, blisteringly un-scary and a waste of talent on about 50 different levels.

Why, oh why, are they remaking "The Fog"..?