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logger
QUOTE (logger @ Aug 11 2011, 12:55 AM) *
Super 8

Clunky as fuck.

I decided to give my biggest disappointment of last year another try as it was on tv. I'm afraid it fared even worse this time round. I can't think of another film that so blatantly, so shamelessly tells you exactly what to think and feel at every single step without even a hint of subtlety or nuance. Add to that the hackneyed story, the script full of exposition, sub plots that are only there to get characters into the right place at the right time, a rubbish bad guy and a story that nobody really wanted telling yet again. And whilst I have to commend the cinematography and the design of the film and even though I liked certain images like the train crash, the kids running through the warzone and the objects floating through the air, I find myself going from asking why this film was set in the early 80s to why was this film even made at all.
sweetbutinsane
Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows

Makes Ennis del Mar and Jack Twist look like homophobes.
Serafina_Pekkala
QUOTE (NiteFall @ May 12 2012, 07:23 PM) *
What about Hellboy? Surely that counts?


This was my thinking. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade also qualifies. BTW I have read several Dennis Wheatley novels and they are remarkably like Inglourious Basterds in a lot of respects. Wheatley himself was a war hero so the idea that these silly WW2 fantastical interpretations devalue the conflict is a modern sentiment and not necessarily one felt by the survivors. Besides the Nazis were occult obsessed lunatics. Himmler even had his own 'soothsayer'.

Coriolanus looks brill.
Rebus
The Woman In Black

Having only sort-of seen about half of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, it's safe to say I'd never really seen Daniel Radcliffe in a movie. I don't know if massive Harry Potter fans would not be able to see him as anything else in a different movie, but I thought he was great in the role of a solicitor going to a creepy old house to sort out the papers of the deceased owner.

Once the scares started they were done really effectively at first, and although somewhere in the middle it began to get a bit familiar. After a while it was just Daniel Radcliffe wondering around a creepy house being scared by a pissed of ghost yet again, or there's another dark corner? Oh she just flitted past the window again? And once the resolution had come, the film had lost its atmosphere somewhat. The less you see in horror movies, the more frightening they, but this was not the case with The Woman In Black. It's still an effective horror story, and it was fantastic to see Hammer back making movies again. They definitely captured that untrustworthy village full of creepy locals that I love in period horrors like that, but by the end I'd become to acclimatised to the ghost and her wicked ways to be effectively scared.

Six and a half rubber chickens out of ten.
Raven
QUOTE (Rebus @ May 13 2012, 10:04 PM) *
The Woman In Black

Having only sort-of seen about half of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, it's safe to say I'd never really seen Daniel Radcliffe in a movie. I don't know if massive Harry Potter fans would not be able to see him as anything else in a different movie, but I thought he was great in the role of a solicitor going to a creepy old house to sort out the papers of the deceased owner.


He's the best actor of the three leads in the Potter films, by quite a way. I suspect he will do very well, provided people can see past Harry Potter.
Sostie
QUOTE
I haven't seen a good Nazi supernatural occult movie in a while


There hasn't a good and proper one since The Keep.

THIS MEANS WAR
Not quite as bad as I had expected. Would have been a hell of a lot worse without Tom Hardy.
Serafina_Pekkala
QUOTE (Sostie @ May 14 2012, 01:41 PM) *
There hasn't a good and proper one since The Keep.


That film has a great inventive concept but it has dated very badly and is so very obviously filmed in Snowdonia.
logger
Black Narcissus

Apocalypse Now for women. Lustful, sausage eating women.
Serafina_Pekkala
I love that film.
sweetbutinsane
QUOTE (Rebus @ May 13 2012, 10:04 PM) *
The Woman In Black

Once the scares started they were done really effectively at first, and although somewhere in the middle it began to get a bit familiar. After a while it was just Daniel Radcliffe wondering around a creepy house being scared by a pissed of ghost yet again, or there's another dark corner? Oh she just flitted past the window again?


That was my problem with it too. I liked it, overall, but there were just too many jump scares and it was blindingly obvious when they were coming so they had little to no effect anyway.
Rebus
My God, re-reading what I wrote, both my grammar and spelling are utterly atrocious. I can only apologise.

The Secret In Their Eyes. (2009)

Argentinian masterpiece of a crime thriller, just top notch in every way. All the performances were superb, the script was sublime, and the plot was just so thoroughly enjoyable to dive right into. It manages to perfectly blend very dark and serious themes with some rare but great moments of comedic writing. And I don't think I'll ever get over just how monumentally amazing a particular shot is. It starts with a bird's eye view way above the city, descends on a football stadium, goes right onto the main characters in the crowd, and proceeds to follow them as they [advance the plot] in the bowels of the stadium. One take. Some kind of trickery must be done, because otherwise that was just pure cinema magic.

EDIT: Oh, and I just read it won the 2010 Foreign Film Oscar, it would have been a crime otherwise.
Serafina_Pekkala
Midnight in Paris

Delightful, romantic, fantastical, inventive, amusing - all that a Woody Allen movie should be. Owen Wilson is perfect as a restless writer who seems stuck in a rut of perpetual dissatisfaction and nostalgia, both with his personal and professional life. During a lavish trip to Paris with his beautiful yet unlikeable fiancé (Rachel McAdams in a thankless but necessary role) and her rich Right-wing parents, his whimsical dreams about Paris in the 1920s take on a new tangible form. All the cast are done to perfection including Alison Pill as a glorious Zelda Fitzgerald, my boyfriend Tom Hiddleston as a dapper F. Scott, Corey Stoll as a sexy Hemingway, Kathy Bates as Gertrude Stein and Adrian Brody (whom I normally detest) as a magnificent Dali. My only quibble was they were not on screen enough - poor Gad Elamleh only got 3 minutes or so. Marian Cotillard and Lea Seydoux also make appropriately gorgeous French dream girls without it being jarring or patronising. Even Carla Bruni was okay. Not a weighty film by any means but light as air and I enjoyed it immensely. Some excellent quips too discussing Valium, rhinoceroses and Luis Bunuel's movies.

Oh to live that life.
Rebus
Grave of the Fireflies.

Holy shit, if you value your happiness then avoid this movie like the plague. It is the single most depressing film I have ever seen. It is achingly beautiful yes, and some of the animation is just spectacular, as you'd expect from Studio Ghibli, but sweet Christ is it just soul-crushingly sad. It make you disgusted that you're a human, rips your heart out and slowly feeds it back to you through your tear ducts, and then lingers on the sadness for way too long. The story of a young brother and sister trying to make their way through life in war-torn Japan (after everything they know and loved is bombed to shit) is just a paradigm of depressing film-making, to a ridiculous degree.

Sherlock Holmes: Game of Shadows.

I enjoyed the first one more, but this was still an enjoyable enough romp. The music kind of grabbed you by the throat and didn't let go at times, to a distracting degree, and Guy Ritchie really out-Ritchied himself with the extreme slo-mo/super quick/slo mo action shots. He could stand to do that less as it's getting a bit overused in so many movies. Decent popcorn nonsense, but not a patch on Cumberpatch.
Outatime
QUOTE (Rebus @ May 20 2012, 09:42 PM) *
Grave of the Fireflies.

Holy shit, if you value your happiness then avoid this movie like the plague. It is the single most depressing film I have ever seen. It is achingly beautiful yes, and some of the animation is just spectacular, as you'd expect from Studio Ghibli, but sweet Christ is it just soul-crushingly sad. It make you disgusted that you're a human, rips your heart out and slowly feeds it back to you through your tear ducts, and then lingers on the sadness for way too long. The story of a young brother and sister trying to make their way through life in war-torn Japan (after everything they know and loved is bombed to shit) is just a paradigm of depressing film-making, to a ridiculous degree.


I feel cheated because I wasn't as depressed as everyone says they were after this film. Maybe I've just got a heart of stone.
GundamGuy_UK
The Dark Crystal - This has been one of my favourite films since I was little, so any review I write will be very biased. As far as I'm concerned, it's perfect.
bigfatrich
QUOTE (GundamGuy_UK @ May 21 2012, 12:44 PM) *
The Dark Crystal - This has been one of my favourite films since I was little, so any review I write will be very biased. As far as I'm concerned, it's perfect.

It's been a long, long time since I watched it. I seem to remember thinking that it ended at an odd place; that's to say it could have gone of for a little longer to really wrap things up. But, as I've written, it's been a long, long time. I really enjoyed it at the time, but wonder if it will bear re-watching without being disappointing.
Serafina_Pekkala
QUOTE (bigfatrich @ May 21 2012, 02:39 PM) *
It's been a long, long time since I watched it. I seem to remember thinking that it ended at an odd place; that's to say it could have gone of for a little longer to really wrap things up. But, as I've written, it's been a long, long time. I really enjoyed it at the time, but wonder if it will bear re-watching without being disappointing.


It was my favourite film as a kid and for good reason. I think the film really stands up and the Skeksis are still as fucking terrifying as ever. You wouldn't get the Emperor's death or the scene with the food in a kids film now. The music is also wonderful too and atmospheric as hell. CGI cannot recreate textures like this so it is always gonna look better. Also, the veneer of age gives it a strange legendary quality. The only thing is the Gelfling mouths and arms etc look a bit stilted - but it is muppets.

I think Hungarian actually really sounds like Podling haha.

GundamGuy_UK
QUOTE (bigfatrich @ May 21 2012, 02:39 PM) *
It's been a long, long time since I watched it. I seem to remember thinking that it ended at an odd place; that's to say it could have gone of for a little longer to really wrap things up. But, as I've written, it's been a long, long time. I really enjoyed it at the time, but wonder if it will bear re-watching without being disappointing.


It ends very suddenly, I'll agree there. The day is saved, the credits roll. It feels like there's more to it than is on screen, and apparently the book The World of The Dark Crystal fills in a few gaps.

QUOTE (Serafina_Pekkala @ May 21 2012, 03:06 PM) *
It was my favourite film as a kid and for good reason. I think the film really stands up and the Skeksis are still as fucking terrifying as ever. You wouldn't get the Emperor's death or the scene with the food in a kids film now. The music is also wonderful too and atmospheric as hell. CGI cannot recreate textures like this so it is always gonna look better. Also, the veneer of age gives it a strange legendary quality. The only thing is the Gelfling mouths and arms etc look a bit stilted - but it is muppets.

I think Hungarian actually really sounds like Podling haha.


The picture has aged, but the content hasn't. Like you said, it somehow adds to it now that it's old. I genuinely think it's a perfect film - the fact that it feels a little like it's a story in a larger legend (which doesn't exist) gives it a unique quality. Even as a kid I thought it was weird how Jen was the main character but didn't look as good as everything else. I think the other characters and creatures look better because of all the wrinkles and scars and warts and stuff on them; Jen's smooth skin can't help but look a bit rubbery in comparison.

The Skeksis have always stolen the show for me, anyway. The Emperor's death scene is brilliant, and not just for the crumbling body. I think it's genius how they all take a step back in unison (with the camera facing their faces) when he yells, and all lean in again when he dies. There are so many little touches like that.

Jim Henson said it wasn't just a film, it was a work of art, and the project he was most proud of being involved in.


I really want a DVD release with an audio track using the original Skeksis language. I'd love to see it all as a film, rather than just clips.

EDIT: This opening scene is PERFECTION
"The Skeksis, with their hard and twisted bodies; their harsh and twisted wills." That is a brilliant line.


They don't make good, scary, non-patronising kids movies anymore.
Serafina_Pekkala
QUOTE (GundamGuy_UK @ May 21 2012, 03:33 PM) *
Jim Henson said it wasn't just a film, it was a work of art, and the project he was most proud of being involved in.


He is justified in both assertions. Brian Froud is an amazing visual artist so his input makes it extra unique. Henson knew how to take it forward. It is also wonderful that both men did this for an audience of children, without underselling the story. Nowadays it seems animation is CGI with a weak story about cartoon animals voiced by comedy sitcom actors.

QUOTE
I really want a DVD release with an audio track using the original Skeksis language. I'd love to see it all as a film, rather than just clips.


I never saw the Skeksis language clips till recently. Again shows the level of detail behind the story.
GundamGuy_UK
You should look up Froud's book, "The World of The Dark Crystal". It can be pretty expensive on eBay, but cheaper copies do exist. I got mine for £20.

Where are today's Dark Crystals, NeverEnding Stories, Labyrinths, Temple of Dooms, and so on? I know they're readily available for children who watch, but do they care? My 12-year-old sister was never interested in them; they were my favourite films as a child. CGI vs puppets isn't my issue, it's the content. It's all fart gags, lowest common denominator slapstick, and 'mild peril'. Where are the films that scare children, but in a good way? Kids like to get scared, especially if it's the safe kind of scary that fantasy films offer. Very few children's movies have any real story to them now, it's all just a sequence of gags loosely strung together with a plot so thin even the target audience doesn't give a shit about it.

There are exceptions, but Pixar is pretty much the only studio making proper kids films now.
sweetbutinsane
QUOTE (GundamGuy_UK @ May 21 2012, 03:44 PM) *
CGI vs puppets isn't my issue, it's the content. It's all fart gags, lowest common denominator slapstick, and 'mild peril'.


To be fair, Despicable Me has two of the those three things, but it's bloody brilliant all the same. smile.gif
maian
Or Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs, which is goddamn hilarious.
Rebus
QUOTE (Outatime @ May 21 2012, 10:55 PM) *
I feel cheated because I wasn't as depressed as everyone says they were after this film. Maybe I've just got a heart of stone.


To be fair, sine having a baby I am a totally different person when it comes to seeing children going through torment on-screen. If I was childless I probably wouldn't have reacted in the same way at all, but since having a daughter I now find things like that much more affecting.
monkeyman
QUOTE (maian @ May 21 2012, 08:02 PM) *
Or Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs, which is goddamn hilarious.

QFT and that
logger
The Raid

Good when there's fighting, not as good when there's not fighting because then all you're thinking is hurry up and start fighting again, and this happens enough for it to be a factor but not enough for it to stop it from being a good martial arts/action movie, which is all this is and not the second coming some people would have you believe.

Stabbings are going to be up this month.
sweetbutinsane
The Dictator

Given the reaction on tumblr, I expect to be judged for saying this... I thought it was hilarious. It made me laugh before it even started.
NiteFall
The Avengers

I really, really enjoyed it. Being the comic book fanboy that I am I liked that Loki's staff of mind-controlling weirdness had the Blue gem of Mind from the Infinity Gauntlet stuck on the top of it. Which obviously ties into Thanos being the power behind the Chitauri. Which is another thing- in all of the pre-release press, Joss Whedon said the aliens were definitely not the Kree or Skrulls.
So what are they?
They're the version of the Skrulls from The Ultimates.
The ones that also go by the name Skrulls.
laugh.gif
Silky
QUOTE (NiteFall @ May 23 2012, 12:31 AM) *
The Avengers

I really, really enjoyed it. Being the comic book fanboy that I am I liked that Loki's staff of mind-controlling weirdness had the Blue gem of Mind from the Infinity Gauntlet stuck on the top of it. Which obviously ties into Thanos being the power behind the Chitauri. Which is another thing- in all of the pre-release press, Joss Whedon said the aliens were definitely not the Kree or Skrulls.
So what are they?
They're the version of the Skrulls from The Ultimates.
The ones that also go by the name Skrulls.
laugh.gif

Ahem
As I explained on Facebook...
It's to do with film rights. Because the Skrull first appeared in the Fantastic Four, the rights to use the Skrull belong to Fox.
tongue.gif
GundamGuy_UK
Disney should just buy the rights to Spider-Man and Fantastic Four movies. I've not seen the F4 movies but I've not heard great things; a reboot in the current Marvel movies style would be good. Not to mention Spider-Man in The Avengers 2.

Con Air - Amazingly, I'd never seen this before. I loved every second of it, it's a perfect stupid action movie. Nick Cage is either the best or worst actor in the world.
NiteFall
QUOTE (GundamGuy_UK @ May 23 2012, 01:15 PM) *
Nick Cage is either the best or worst actor in the world.


I think Nic Cage was perfectly summed up by Roger Ebert-
QUOTE
Cage is a good actor in good movies, and an almost indispensable actor in bad ones.
logger
The Player

I liked the bits with Lyle Lovett, it was like a David Lynch film when he was in it.
Rebus
That's actually encouraging to hear that Con Air is still enjoyed in exactly the way it should be upon first viewing FIFTEEN YEARS after it was first released. Nicolas Cage is spectacularly hilaribad, but I think it's Malcovich and Buscemi who really raise it to the heights of one of the most stupidly perfect crapaction movies ever made.

Robot Monster (1953)

Clocking in at just about over an hour long, they really started running out of ideas fast with this one. If there hadn't been a bizarre and pointless post-apocalyptic wedding scene, the movie would have been 50 minutes long. A giant ape beast wearing a space helmet lands on earth and with the aid of a CB radio and a bubble machine, and proceeds to wipe out all of humankind. A group of plucky humans are the only ones left because the patriarch is a German scientist who created a serum that prevents them from getting sick (read: immune to illness also seemingly means impervious to total annihilation by nuclear bombs). The eponymous robot monster tries to track down the humans whilst constantly being berated by his superior who's off-world somewhere waiting to invade the planet with the rest of the hairy ape astronauts, all while trying to stay as close to the mouth of his cave as possible, where his equipment is (I'm guessing it was a too dark to shoot in the cave).

Terribly written females as you'd expect from 50s sci fi, child murder, creatures from another planet getting in touch with their "humanity" because of the promise of tits, slow walking arms outstretched action!, some very dodgy and lengthy attempts at scientific jargon, some of the shonkiest props I have EVER seen, an utterly baffling but quite alarming fight between an alligator with a fin strapped to its back and a goanna (twice), and a complete cop out of an ending. I loved every single goddamned minute of it.


*Please Note: None of the bottom right of this picture actually happens, and the robot monster does not have this face.
monkeyman
I...I must see this film
sweetbutinsane
QUOTE (Rebus @ May 23 2012, 09:43 PM) *
*Please Note: None of the bottom right of this picture actually happens, and the robot monster does not have this face.


Boo.

You've still made me want to watch it, though. laugh.gif
GundamGuy_UK


I think it was supposed to have that face, but the skull was too hard/expensive to work with, so instead it's just a white mask.
Silky
Predators.

You can pretty much tell who's going to make it to the end from the get go but still a pretty enjoy able film with some cool deaths. The end credit music seemed a bit jarring but then I remembered Predator and smiled.
Still wish someone had said "Get to tha choppa!"
GundamGuy_UK
Crank 2: High Voltage - It was alright. Obviously I wasn't expecting it to be anything other than gratuitous violence, and in that respect it did deliver. I don't know if it was because I watched it alone, or if the movie is too aware of how well the formula worked the first time, but it just felt forced the entire time. I did enjoy it, but it just wasn't the same as the first movie, which I genuinely like a lot. Some of the action was excellent, and it's still a very entertaining way to kill 90 minutes.

So what will the premise for Crank 3 be?
Rebus
QUOTE (Silky @ May 25 2012, 08:41 AM) *
Predators.
Still wish someone had said "Get to tha choppa!"


Was it not enough for you that it was said in the masterstroke of film-making that was the AVP sequel? Guy made it sound like a frightened plea rather than an iconic demand. Also, an alien queen fucking up a pregnant woman and salivating all over babies in incubators was very uncool.
Silky
QUOTE (Rebus @ May 24 2012, 09:45 PM) *
Was it not enough for you that it was said in the masterstroke of film-making that was the AVP sequel? Guy made it sound like a frightened plea rather than an iconic demand. Also, an alien queen fucking up a pregnant woman and salivating all over babies in incubators was very uncool.

Was that the remake of Resident Evil where they replaced the zombies with aliens in post production?
Seriously, those films are pretty much the same.
GundamGuy_UK
AVP was one of the most disappointing films I've ever seen. I've not seen the sequel, or Predators for that matter.
Is Predators an official 3rd movie, or is it part of the shitty non-canon AVP timeline?
Silky
QUOTE (GundamGuy_UK @ May 24 2012, 10:27 PM) *
AVP was one of the most disappointing films I've ever seen. I've not seen the sequel, or Predators for that matter.
Is Predators an official 3rd movie, or is it part of the shitty non-canon AVP timeline?

I believe it's an official one. Seeing as the mention Dutch's mission.
GundamGuy_UK
QUOTE (Silky @ May 24 2012, 10:30 PM) *
I believe it's an official one. Seeing as the mention Dutch's mission.


Yeah, but AVP had Bishop in (who is somehow Bishop Weyland, despite Alien 3 showing that Bishop was modeled on a human living at the time of Aliens, not a man centuries ago), to tie it with the others.
Ugh, that movie was so bad I'm getting angry just thinking about it.

Seriously, how can you fuck up that idea so badly? All you had to do was re-make Aliens and stick a couple of Predators in there as well...
Silky
Good point. I know what you mean I don't get why it was set now. The games (the old pc games mostly) and the comics are set in the future. It works much better.
GundamGuy_UK
AVP is about colonial marines in space fighting aliens and predators. It isn't about a group of hitchhikers inside a giant Rubik's pyramid in present-day Antarctica.
As far as I'm aware, AVP has always been set around the time of Aliens, with the Marines.

"Whoever wins, we lose" indeed. I can only assume by 'we' they meant the viewing audience.
Silky
Honestly, I'm waiting for this film.

GundamGuy_UK
I've read Batman and Superman vs Aliens and Predator.
Yes, that's real.
Silky
I know. This fan film is pretty damn awesome too.
GundamGuy_UK
To be honest, Batman vs anything would be awesome.

Given enough preparation time, Batman can beat anything.
NiteFall
Except Squirrel Girl. Technically he could, but the amount of prep time required would be longer than the life of the universe.
Silky
Batman vs Batman? cool.gif
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